


Sniffles

by recurringdreams



Series: Symbiosis [9]
Category: British Actor RPF
Genre: F/M, Mild Angst, Nursery decorating, lots of comfort, pregnancy fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-08
Updated: 2015-09-08
Packaged: 2018-04-19 18:44:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4756991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/recurringdreams/pseuds/recurringdreams
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>We were still working together on making sure that the little ones bedroom would be ready when they arrived, and the finishing touch - aside from the new-born clothes and little things like teddies and night-lights - was stocking the bookshelf with the story books that we had been collecting together since the day I had told him we were expecting.</p>
<p>*</p>
<p>Sometimes you just can't do it all on your own. <br/>Pregnancy fluff, tears and comfort.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sniffles

Today had been the worst day on the planet, quite frankly. When I had woken up this morning and stumbled to the shower – after needing to sprint to pee, of course – I had looked down to see whether my toenails needed painting again ( _god, the despair of being pregnant in flip-flop weather)_ and realised that I could no longer see them. My feet weren't there. My toes were gone. My stomach was now the size of a beach ball, and my previously inward-pointing belly button was poking out like the things on the top of a drinks-cup. Half-hysterical at my sudden realisation, I had let the water drip down over me as I had giggle-sobbed _caffeinated, de-caf, caffeinated, de-caf_ while poking at it. The nurse had commented at my last appointment that I was well into the _wild-as-all-hell_ hormonal stage, and though Ben’s face had gone white at the thought, she had reassured him that it wouldn’t last too long. After all, I only had eight weeks before I was due to pop. I felt like I should have been certified as I dragged myself out of the spray and found myself sobbing at the fact that Toby had come to greet me, tail wagging. He was just _so cute._

God, I felt sorry for my husband. He had to put up with _me._

We were still working together on making sure that the little ones bedroom would be ready when they arrived - we had painted the room together weeks ago, aired it out and put up inoffensive drawings that we had both worked on, I had put the cot together over a couple of days when Ben had been away filming and I could still heft and bend, we had worked as a family to quilt a little cover, Toby had settled a new space to sleep in the corner of the room, and we had put up a little toy shelf and bookshelf next to the changing table that Ben had installed. Everything was pretty set up already, though Ben was still looking for a rocking chair and a mobile that would go with the decor. He was near-obsessive with making the room as perfect as possible for our little one, but had been good in letting me do a lot of the organising on my own. The finishing touch - aside from the new-born clothes and little things like teddies and night-lights - was stocking the bookshelf with the story books that we had been collecting together since the day I had told him we were expecting.

I had only wanted to surprise him, to show him how I had organised all of the books out of the box in our cupboard and onto the shelves. I hadn't expected my body to fail me. I hadn't expected that I wouldn't be able to bend my knees, to hold onto the box, to lose all the feeling in my fingers as I tried to pick the fucking thing up...

\--

I stared at my hands and rubbed them together again, willing some strength to come back to them. I had picked up a bottle of water earlier and I couldn't even twist that open. My head dropped back on the chair I had dragged into the room and I rubbed my eyes this time, staring up at the ceiling as I let. My thoughts overwhelm me. It had been five when I had decided to do it, thinking it would take ten minutes while dinner was in the slow cooker, but when Ben came home it was dark and the smell of dinner was permeating the air. I heard the door open quietly and Toby bounded to his feet, running downstairs and giving an excited yip as Benedict greeted him with an enthusiastic hello. I listened to him pottering about for a few minutes in the hopes that I would have calmed down a little more by the time we came together, and had just pushed myself from the chair and moved to the window to draw the curtains as he called out to me.

“Love?” His voice bought me out of my reverie and I cleared my throat before I called out to him. I didn’t want him to think I had upped and left, or… something had happened to me. “Love, are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” I cleared my throat again when my voice cracked and rubbed a hand over my face, taking a long, sniffing breath as I turned to switch the lamp on and stubbed my toe on the edge of the little one’s crib. _Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck that hurt._ The howl that came out of my mouth was more than enough to set Toby off from the corner, and I could hear Ben sprinting up the stairs, his footfalls heavy as he rushed to find me. I fell back into the chair with a soft _oof,_ and rubbed my fingers over my face again, hearing him push the door open so that it banged into the wall and Toby bounced between us, yipping loudly. There were tears blossoming over my cheeks and I could barely breathe for the pain. _I felt so fucking weak._ The tears were more than just pain, I was frustrated that my body wouldn't do what I wanted it to anymore, and for _fucks sake,_ I really wanted to see my feet.

“Kitty?” His hand found mine and I opened my eyes, his fingers curling around mine as his eyes searched my own with a look of concern. His lips pressed gently at my hand and I sighed softly, turning my hand over and brushing my fingers over his cheek. “Oh my love are you ok?”

“I couldn't... Couldn't see my feet. Stubbed my foot on the cot.” I sniffed, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand, and he gave a soft chuckle as he brushed his fingers across my hand again. Whipping a handkerchief out of his top pocket – _my husband was the only man I knew who still carried hankies around with him –_ he gently dabbed at my eyes and kissed my cheek, pulling me into a gentle hug. “Why on God’s earth did we put it together so fucking soon, stupid piece of furniture!”

“Oh, silly Kitten.” Another kiss, this time to my forehead and he smiled again. “I told you to wait till I was home so we could sort all this stuff out together!” He gently stroked my cheek and I huffed softly. “You were all for it last night!”

“All I wanted to do was move the fucking books!” I gestured to the box in the open cupboard. “They were supposed to be easy to move! Light! They’re just children’s books and I couldn’t even lift the box!” I rubbed my hand over my cheek and folded my arms again. “I couldn’t even bend to pick the fucking box up.”

“Love, that’s perfectly natural.” His hand brushed over my hair in an attempt to soothe me and I gave a little sigh. “You’re seven and a bit months pregnant. You’re pretty close to being ready to drop and…” He gently smiled at me, “We’re going to have to work as a team on these things now. It’s natural that your things aren’t going to work in the same way that they did six months ago. There’s a little munchkin in there that can’t wait to get out. He’s going to faff and kick and make you uncomfortable.” His hand gently came to touch my belly, and I huffed, batting at his wrist.

“Ben!” I huffed again and folded my arms, trying not to let out incoherent, sad noises, “You don’t get it. You get to go out to work every morning and practically ignore every fucking moment of this shit. You don’t have bad backs, and your tits aren’t so big that you’re holding on to them every thirty seconds and can’t afford to let go of them when you go down the stairs because one bounce and you’ll be on your back!” On occasion, my emotions ran out of control and I always found it embarrassing when he found me in an absolute mess in the corner of a room, tucked into myself and unable to articulate exactly what was wrong when he found me snotty and miserable. Sometimes there _was_ no explanation, it just happened to hit me, that I felt in over my head and I couldn’t touch the bottom of the pool. When it hit, it hit hard and Ben had never seen me mid flow. Right now, I was losing my shit and there was literally nothing I could do to stop it. I hoped he wouldn’t hate me when I ran out of steam, but I couldn’t stop the words coming. “And don’t talk to me about lying on my back because you might like watching me sleep – and don’t pretend you don’t because I have seen you getting dressed and I have heard you mumbling about how I pretty I look – but I can’t get comfortable because when I'm on my side I'm boiling hot except for this three inch patch on my thigh and if I sleep on my back I’ll probably piss myself or-”

His lips caught mine in a gentle kiss as he shifted up closer to me.

“I’m sorry, love.” He gently stroked his fingers over the bump and brushed his other hand across my cheek. I batted his hand away, frustrated, but he caught my fingers and settled them gently at the bump, his voice soft and gentle. “I know you’re in pain and you’re uncomfortable but… you don’t have to do this on your own. I finish work after Sunday, and we’re going to work together for the last month to get the house ready for little bean,” His fingers stroked a little lower and put a bit of support against my stomach. The weight I had felt on my bladder eased and I gave a soft sigh, watching his face as he watched mine. There was no frustration in his expression, only an earnest desire to look after me, to see that I was ok. “But you don’t have to suffer. I’m here and when I’m not I’m a phone call away. I want to help to make it easier on you because you’re doing things that are fucking ridiculous, Kitty.” His lips pressed at my temple, “Your body is doing wild things that are so incredibly sexy but must be so utterly terrifying for you, and I understand that you’ll want to desperately murder me from time to time because I did this to you but..." He gently brushed a hand over my cheek, brushing my hair from my face and lightly kissing my nose, "darling, you were independent for years before I met you. You were an independent woman while we dated, and my darling," he pressed another kiss to my forehead, then lower, to my nose, and my lips, "you have never asked more of me than you felt necessary, never been selfish when I have expected you to do so much for me. To trust me, to wait for me, to love me when I have been at my worst. But it's time now to let me look after you. To give you what you _want and need,_ to treat you like a fucking queen." His hands came to gently cup my cheeks and he smiled kindly, nipping my bottom lip as he tipped me a wink, "I know it's not what you're used to, but I am rather enjoying taking care of you."

"It's hard." I rested my head against his chest. "Knowing that I can't... I can't do it all like I usually do."

"I know, beautiful." He kissed the top of my head, running his fingers through my hair again, "but do you trust me?" His voice was soft.

"Of course I do, baby," I looked up to meet his eyes, "there's nobody on this earth I trust more than you."

"Good." He smiled and gently brushed my hair from my cheeks, tucking it behind my ear, "I made a promise to you a couple years ago, that I would have you and hold you and that I would do what it took to make your life easier, and right now I need you to let me keep that promise, beautiful." He hesitated, then gently leaned in to press his forehead against mine, "will you let me?"

"If..." I let my hand move to his cheek. "If you'll forgive me?"

"My beautiful girl, there is _nothing_ to forgive. You're allowed your emotions, your frustrations, and your fears. But you'll let me take care of you?"

"I'll get huffy, from time to time."

"Of course you will. It's natural." His smile widened and he gently kissed my forehead. "But before you do, I want you to give me a kiss, and I want you to remember the next fifteen minutes.” I nodded, just a little confused, and he took my hand, gently running his fingers over mine, “Come to the bedroom with me." I blinked at him, confused, and he smiled blithely, before helping me to my feet. Slowly, he drew me through to the bedroom, running his fingers along mine and making me giggle as he slowly settled me onto the bed, on my side. A moment later, and he was lying beside me, looking into my eyes and giving me a little smile. "Comfy?"

"I don't need to pee yet. But it is only a matter of time, my love."

"Excellent." He stroked his finger up my arm, resting on the duvet between us. Ever so gently, he continued his path along my skin, circling joints and tracing the outlines of my clothes as he peeled them away. "I will protect you, my darling." He lifted my hand, and pressed a kiss to my palm. "I will hold you close and I will help you back up, and you will be you again," I shuddered at his kind words, at the gentle way he was touching me. "It will take some time but we will be _us_ again. And we will be mummy and daddy, too."

"Are you going to be mummy?" I chuckled, feeling the tears come again, "you looked bloody good in that dress." I glanced over at the photos on our wall and he pulled me into a closer embrace.

"Christ, woman," he laughed, "I dress up once and you never let me forget it, do you?"

"You had better legs than most of the women in that bar." I stretched to squeeze his thigh and he groaned softly, pulling my leg over his.

"I like your legs better." His hand curved low and he brushed his fingers gently over my knickers. "And what's between them."

"Oh, you are a charmer," I couldn't help but giggle, gently putting my hand down, catching at his wrist, "could we put a pin in this for a minute?"

"Er, yeah, sure." His face coloured and he looked a little sheepish. "Sorry, I thought-"

"No, no..." I smiled and lightly gave his hand a squeeze, feeling my own face colour bright red as he turned back to me. "I want it, but... Baby, I just need to pee."

"Oh!" He perked up a little then, and gave me a gentle squeeze. "Go, then. I'll be waiting."


End file.
